Let’s cash up

One of our best colleagues is finishing up with us in two days. She is one of the best human beings I’ve ever met and it was a huge privilege to work with her. Everywhere she went praise was short on her heels. And leaving us, although we’ll miss her, is a good thing. She’s decided to start following her dream and that’s probably the only reason I’ll ever feel happy about someone leaving us.

Another one of our ladies has decided to move on at the end of the year. I think it is a good move. She feels called to get another qualification and when I look at her and her personality and the things she excels at I know it’s a good move. Same story with one of my guys, feels led into education. Wants to become a teacher, and trust me, if there was ever a man that can lift the face of educators in South Africa he’s the guy.

Lastly, another lady has to move from one school to another. Not by choice though. The principle there has a decided vision for his school and he doesn’t see her fitting in. Although I respect his choice, and him, he is a great man, in my heart I question if he understands the huge loss they will actually have. This lady is one of the most passionate, mature, disciplined and above else involved employees we have. The amount of quality relationships she has with her kids is almost unbelievable. As long as she remains with us I’m happy.

All this really got me thinking. I remember when I had to start wrapping things up at my school. I was offered a different position in the company which meant I would have to leave my school. This creates mixed feelings. I knew where I was going and as such there was a definite sense of excitement. Some of our guys finishing up now are treading on new and uncertain ground. The others, like my colleague who was asked to move, doesn’t actually want to go. In her heart she had so much she still wanted to give and do. So, I can only imagine, there must be a different kind of sadness in her heart.

There is one shared thought and emotion between all of us though. And that is: What will become of my kids. This gets mixed with a permeating uncertainty of “did I do enough”. In short, our human part takes over and bunch of mixed emotions start to play with our minds and hearts.

And this is normal, so normal, because what else is it than love?

A love that developed over time for each and every kid we counseled, coached, held, supported, laughed with, cried with, camped with, faught with, joked with and walked with. A love that gets so big it sort of consumes our whole being. It becomes part of who and what we, are and the realization of that being imminently and suddenly lost, wakes us to all these fears and doubts that now play games with our peace and focus.

It’s normal though, we have to feel it, but at the end of the day it’s needs to be brought back into perspective.

And that is this: We can only do what we can in the time that we have. The rest is up to God. And let’s remember, it was God who, through His great mercy, gave you to each other for this time. Personally, I found great peace in just accepting that. And also accepting in the time I had I did what I could. As far as I am able to hear and understand the Lord, I seeked Him for direction and I tried to follow His instruction. Nothing more and nothing less. In this there is peace guys. Remember, God doesn’t expect more or less than that which He asks of you. He seeks obedience, and obedience is final. And let’s not pretend we are perfect and that we always hear Him or that we always do what He says. We don’t. We miss. We screw up. But we try, and if we are sincere in our trying, grace, mercy and growth follows.

And as for next month and next year. We are not irreplaceable. We play only a small role in what God is ALREADY doing in their lives. His plan will carry on. He will bring the next Coach, oom, tannie, teacher, friend, pastor (or whoever He has already decided to bring) and His loving work will carry on. Just as we do. Do not dwell in this year or last year or next year. Dwell on God and His awesome dream for humanity and His Kingdom. Dwell on this and find trust and peace flowing into your heart. Dwell on this and find your own true place as His vision fills you with hope and understanding.

As for the guys that are still in their school. Know that your D-Day is coming. Know that you only have a time with these kids and seek to understand what the Lord is doing in their lives. Seek to understand what your role is in your school and in their lives and then strive to fulfill that. Nothing more and nothing less. Let’s not see how much we can do, let’s rather make sure that what we are doing, is the right thing.

Be blessed and carry on the awesome work!

~ by Schalk Holloway on September 20, 2007.